Cricket Media and Administration are boring and Fucked up

2 Jun


The Douchebag Media, (you know, who you are)

I have had enough of your = ‘the media’, articles Anti-T20 Anti-ODI Anti-Test, WAIT what? Anti-Test cricket!!! (Scratch that Anti-Test article)

First, you told us Test Cricket is the best form of the game, we all said, yeh, yeh yeh YES absolutely it is. I mean look how hard it is to play! 90 overs under Sun, that pressure of posting huge total, then pressure of bowling out side early, then pressure of posting total again, then pressure of bowling out side again. It’s super pressure game. It takes the shit out of you. But Tea and Lunch comes to the rescue to save you from rigorous work. Very tough. You gotta have stamina to survive that long.

Then, secondly, you told us yeh, test cricket is great but champion of the world has to be decided by WC. So, you told us, winning ODI is as tough as anything in the cricket. You would be top of the world if you win that. (except if you are England Cricket team and till you win the WC). So you write up all great things about WC winning journey, show us interview video of legends of the game, so thrilling to hear, goosebumps and come. Mistyeyes and all that. Yes, Loved it.

Then, the T20 comes. Wait, I have to divide here.

Then, You talk about IPL.

Then, You talk about the rest of the T20 other than IPL.

Let’s first talk about the rest of the T20 other than IPL.

Here is how you talk about it, it’s great they play the tourney, some players should get into the side, ICC T20 WC will be held at such an such places, It’s all cool and all. You know county needs to do something to survive you know, people love it. The kids, parents, have their family time. They take their kids to the game enjoy it, they have fun for the night, it’s just fantastic atmosphere.

Then, they talk about the IPL, Something like this.

“ohhh not again this IPL, Games are run by absolute lunatics I tell you, terrible commentary, they suck up to broadcasters, terrible team selection, if I was them I would have chosen this team, oooohh God! they must tired of flights, ohh I am sure they are exhausted from previous tournament, meh, it’s just terrible pitch you know. Oh btw. did I tell you that this IPL performance doesn’t count. I hate this job. I should rather be covering  something else. Ohh wait test cricket is the hardest form of the game you know, performance here doesn’t get you anywhere. I should rather be covering Ranji Match. Ohhh wait Test squad is announced, that’s what is more important.”

and this is on repeat for 4 years.


You are boring me.

I get it Test Cricket is hard, ODI WC is important. I also get it, the way you totally ignore T20 that is being played in UK county, Australia, Zimbabwe, South Africa, West Indies, but your stomach ulcerate covering IPL.

Yes, I get it. I have been hearing this for 4 fucking years. (And MANY TO COME)

Now, how about some reality check!

How many players actually play IPL and represent your test squad, but they totally suck?

Let’s start with India,

Yes, almost everyone play IPL, because it is Indian Premiere League. They all play good test cricket too. WOh I didn’t see that coming.

Australia: Doug Bollinger, Shane Watson, Mike Hussey and Harris, they are all good. In test sqaud and in IPL, (no, Shaun Marsh is not in the test squad)

South Africa: Smith, Kallis, Abdv, Steyn, Morkel, who is playing bad test cricket from these? No-one

Srilanka: Mahela, Sanga, and Dilshan (meh, at Randiv and Parera) all are good and class of their own. They play both cricket very well.

England: Morgan (only ONE, wohhh I didn’t see that coming)

Did I include all good test playing team?

Oh wait, NewZeland, Pakistan and WI. Oh yeh, I can ignore them because they barely can win Test series at the moment.

Awww, Was I harsh? “Yeh”, Cry me a river, because that’s the truth.

So, let me get this.

You are accusing IPL (and not zillion T20 around) for everything now? Really?

One guy from England, No Pakistani, 3 players from Lanka, One test player (Gayle) from WI, 3-4 Australians, 5 SAfricans = around 14 main players from 8 test playing nation.


Who are rest of them, they are either hurt, Indian kids, Club cricketers who are trying to make their living through playing cricket. Kids who couldn’t get in to national squad or want to get in permanently to their national squad.

Here is what I commented on one of the Cricinfo article.

“I am not sure about players getting noticed, but I am sure about them becoming Ripe sooner than expected. More than 50,000 thousands people around the globe (where 30000 is lone Indian) but nevertheless they stare you,they record your performance, they analyze you, they have spent money on you, and they want you to perform. If you want to give final touch for young players to be ready to face the real world, you have to put them in Hot place. Despite all the heat around you, and you perform and show top class performance, they get reward. ….. I just hope that Good international players don’t become sandwich in between IPL and rest of the Boards, otherwise it will big loss for country more than player himself”

“To be honest, I just thought it can work in reverse too. If you want to get call from IPL auction, you have to perform very good cricket in your respective country as well. No-one is going to call you for an auction if you don’t play responsible cricket for your country. So, if you want to play IPL, then perform well in ODI, perform well in Test, show your technique while you play your domestic games. I just saw Mitch Marsh the kid who just won under 19 wc and he got call from Deccan, what was that ? It was because he was captain of under 19 champion. See all the cricket around world have to do, is to take advantage of stage. If you hate IPL or Indians, they are going to stay away from you, and take full throttle advantage of your hatred and make millions out of it. Love or hate you have to decide, IPL will not stop, take advantage. Use it or Loose it.”

Auction will happen after every 3rd year! And New International players will be picked from what? and Where? from either respective domestic performance or International success. Don’t you get it? 2-3 auctions from now, no-one is going to pick you, if you don’t perform in to your country. Because franchise WILL tussle for ‘good’ players.

Then, why on earth, your tone is so pessimistic douche-y when you are covering cricket.

Okay, let me divert you with something else.

North American media covers MLB, NFL, NHL, MMA, UFC, Olympics, WINTER olympics, NBA, Tennis, Golf you name it ..etc.

Guess what!?

Most of the play offs games are full houses.


Think about it yourselves. How are they managing to attract so many crowd ergo fans?

Many reasons 1) The game is there for long time 2) There are fans of those games 3) There is hidden unity among sports coverage. 4) Big Market. etc. etc.

also, YES, Their Media covering fantastic. They don’t pick on one game from another, like teenage girl dislikes other girl’s hairstyle.

Have you heard, people who cover NBA make fun of NHL or MLB or MLB?

Do they say, meh Dunking is so not pinnacle of athleticism but hitting homerun is? Ever heard of that shit in big ASS front sports-page? Ever heard of anyone dissing Phelps but hailing Lebron James’s Tattoo?

You dumbass, they work together. Sportsmen/women even visit each other games, which even adds more value to it.

And you are sitting in your lazy ass, and typing it out …

“yeh yeh TEST cricket give me goosebumps, empty stands at IPL is because they love Test cricket, and winning ODI WC is greatest shit on the planet but test cricket is the main thing, but I don’t mind watching IPL, because they play with game’s legends’ but it’s still not pinnacle of the game but I also miss Greatest WI side, We have the greatest Test side, T20 performance doesn’t count, ohh and did I tell you that I THInk many games are fixed, I love domestic games more than anything, players should be picked according to that ….”

Stop stop stop being douche-bag lazy hypocrite.

Look around you. Think what are you typing? and how much boring it sounds. Grow up.

Stop fiddling with fan’s mind.

Boards leaders already hate each other, now you don’t add your own gasoline in the game, so game end up burning.

Your job is to report, and cover the story optimistically. You are smothering fans and players.

Both of you, your stupid media covering and stupid egoistic board members.

It looks absolutely childish seeing you throw a stone at someone when you’r sitting on your Parents’ lap.

All you gotta do is to cover and administer one game … one game only. And both of you are failing to do so. I am tired of same old story again and again.

UNITE you dumbass. Or your egoistic approach of dissing other tourny and format will destroy the game. Give enough space to each tournaments. Cover it properly. Talk about one players ability vs other players ability. Stop playing with fan’s mind. Think logically. Innovate your writing, innovate your media covering,

Current example: NBA final and NHL final are both running at the same time at the moment. LOOK both are full houses!!! After they are done, people aren’t going to write “ohhh how can you watch this? we were just exhausted from NHL and NBA .. oh MAN” No, they don’t do that. They have enough fans of every single game, because they ‘COVER’ it good. There is decent enough unity among broadcasters. They don’t diss other tournaments, because they aren’t getting paid for it.

Owner of one franchise doesn’t diss owner of other one. But here in Cricket, we are already freaken divided to start with!!

And guess what? We even do survey, which board is evil! which board is saint!

Fuck OFF

Go back to high-school ..


2 Responses to “Cricket Media and Administration are boring and Fucked up”

  1. Babua June 13, 2011 at 9:56 am #

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    • knowledge_eater June 15, 2011 at 2:04 am #

      Thanks for the comment. I am busy with studies at the moment, that’s why I rarely blog, so I will be unable to blog during that time period.


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